Tread softly because you tread on my dreams

I've trodden on my own dreams, it would seem. On Thursday I was told that I have osteoporosis and that I have to stop running. Devasation, shock and incredulity scarcely begin to describe my feelings since then. It's ben snowing since about midnight and looks like snow has set in for the whole weekend- I'm too scared to leave the house in case I fall. Suddenly old age has hit me yet I'm only 41.

I was never much of a one for WB Yeats, but I looked at this earlier this morning and changed my mind. I think it has much of the simple directness of Seamus Heaney- a poet I very much admire.

Had I the heaven's embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,

I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.



Baby Steps

My new resolution is to manage a fast walk for at least 30 minutes every day. Today I went out for a bit longer as I badly needed to get away from never-ending housework (it still hasn't all got done but I've now given up for the day). I was out for an hour and three times managed very short bursts of a gentle jog. By my standards a pretty poor effort at jogging but compared to so many people I see out, not so bad. But the main thing is I could go faster than a walk! It wasn't pain free but the discomfort was minimal as long as I didn't push it for more than 30-60 seconds. Sometimes I tried it and really couldn't, but it is progress.

And it bodes well for helping me get back in shape. Although the worst pain has been gone for a while now, I still haven't been able to completely get rid of the lurgy. It's not too bad now though so hopefully I can get back to the gym at last, too! The absence of training means I've had to put away some of my favourite Metalicus things because right now they feel just a little bit too clingy :-(

In other news: Far too many knitting projects vying for my time right now, with the unsurprising result being nothing is actually getting finished.

Efforts

So, physio has discharged me because he has fixed the problem he found in my back but it hasn't fixed my running injury in my hip. Maybe the bone scan results will shed some light on what's going on there. In the meantime I can manage a 30 minute fast walk now with a hill or two, and I'm trying very hard to do that each day. It's not easy to be motivated because to me going for a walk just doesn't feel like 'proper' exercise even though I do walk pretty fast. I'm continuing with daily yoga too. Often just 20 minutes but I guess that even a short session of something very gentle and restorative can only be a Good Thing.

I am distracted with LOTS of knitting projects I want to do as well as things I've promised people I'll do. I really have to get started on the bridal meerkat and this weekend need to do some knitted cupcakes for work (we're doing a unit on healthy living). Currently making a large green spider and I just found a really splendid pattern for a fly on that most fabulous site ravelry.com

But this is what I found and bought yesterday:

There are the cutest dinosaurs imaginable and I just want to make them all!

Complications

Well, running remains off the agenda. I have  tried to look for small mercies; today was the MK half marathon and it snowed much of the morning so I'm glad I wasn't running in that!

Earlier in the week I went for a bone scan and from what the radiographer let on I have osteopenia. That was very surprising since I've been keeping fit regularly for years and always included some kind of bone-stressing activity. I guess I haven't been eating as much dairy recently and I do drink alcohol (but not to any kind of excess) so maybe my diet is to blame. And the lack of sun here in the miserably cold and wet and gloomy UK. Whatever the cause I have an uncomfortable 10 day wait now to see my GP to get the results of the scan.

It's hard not to feel completely beaten by this. My mood is low because of the lack of exercise and the associated changes in my figure, and it just feels like one set back after another.

Too much knitting!

A busy week for knitting. I had to make a Where's Wally hat for a friend, I started a dress for youngest's teddy, and to make up for having to knit boring stuff I made Alexander Beetle yesterday. Here he is:

The eyes are from buttons I'd bought to go on a chicken, but they are very good as beetle eyes.

I've gone a bit googly-eyed from so much needle work this week so might have to lay off for a few days. I wonder what would be fun to make next...