It's been longer than intended between posts. I've tried writing a few times but nothing came out right and to be quite honest I've not really had much to say. It's been so very busy and I've been so tired that there was nothing particularly interesting to write about, just the daily grind of work, family, chores, and the plods.
But this weekend has been awesome! Tiring, but really it's been the best weekend in ages and ages. I went Out, drove somewhere new, coped with driving on the M25, and met Other People. I went up a lot of hills and also went down a few steep hills. And it made me happy.
I might have mentioned that I have a challenge much later in the year; yesterday I went out to see whether I might have it in me to attempt this challenge. Luckily for me I had lovely company including a great guide, and the most beautiful weather. On the day the weather will probably not be lovely and there might not be much company, but yesterday was at least a start in the right direction. Anyway, given that my legs feel super-strong today even after 24 miles with 1500m climb yesterday plus a quick-ish 10 miles this morning, I think I might just have it in me to make a decent attempt at my plans.
It's been a long time since I just went out, lost all sense of time, and was completely absorbed in every moment of being outside. But yesterday was exactly that. I hiked, smiled, laughed, and talked with other people without feeling judged or inadequate. And I didn't feel inadequate with my hiking either. I did feel a little uncomfortable being bigged up with the suggestions that I would 'beast' this challenge- it feels like too much pressure and I know that so much could go wrong on the day- but on the other hand I feel strong and up for anything. I'm scared to be confident, but I know I must carry confidence with me otherwise there's no point in continuing. They say of the Barkley Marathons that you have to believe you can finish...
It wasn't my favourite terrain- I like undulating woods and fields best- but I know I climb steep hills well and that's in my favour. I genuinely enjoy a gnarly uphill. Downhill scares the willies out of me, but I just have to practise and practise and improve everything else so that time lost on descents doesn't matter. I have to get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. I'm out of my comfort zone all the time at work so really I should be able to do that with running.
The voice inside that is crying out to live and to do is getting stronger. I can't undo the wrinkles, white hair and scars of the past, but I can allow this voice to be heard and, where I can, give it free rein. I'm no longer young but there is so much living and running I want to do.
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| Furry cow |
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| Smiles all round |
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| Nope, I didn't park either of those cars |
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| A grand day out |
