Friday night thoughts

It's not been the best of weeks so far. I took the hip niggle to my masseur who did some very unpleasant things to it and told me to ease off the mileage/ time on feet to a point where I can complete a run with neither pain nor discomfort. I've known Gareth for a good few years now and trust his judgement on such matters, so advice duly heeded resulting in 3 runs of about 5 miles each since my treatment on Monday. That makes just 20 miles for the week so far and rather less than 4 hours on my feet which is a lot less than I'd like, but for the long-term success of this year's training it's crucial to allow enough adaptation time. Running quicker is already feeling easier but it's still a shock to a body that's only plodded for the last couple of years!

Strength work isn't happening as often as I'd like either, but at least it is happening and I'm getting through all the exercises. The biggest enemy isn't time but sleep, or rather the lack of it. I'm just not sleeping well and so may days I simply can't get up and function at 5am or summon the effort needed to do anything constructive. I don't have a bedroom or a bed so all the stuff about creating a peaceful sleeping environment isn't helpful- I do the best I can with what I have.

And that's the thing when you have big goals. I'm not a pro, I'm not charged with getting good results, no one cares whether I stick to a training plan or not. I have a stressful job, stressful enough that I went part-time (and am now broke) because it was making me ill with unhappiness; and I have two children who need me very much at the moment. This stuff about being 'the best that you can be' is all very well but it can be at the risk of losing balance in life.

I love running. It has brought me much joy and it keeps me on a relatively even keel. But it also makes me exhausted and ache all over, and sometimes it has made me very unhappy. There are other things that I love doing and I think it's important to give them time too.