Last week I did a lot of walking. 36 miles in 4 days. It was good to be moving slowly and take in more of my surroundings and it felt nice to just walk with no purpose. I went out each time with my rucksack (an OMM Ultra 12 which I love for hiking but can't get on with in races) and a snack, drink, extra layer and binoculars. A couple of times I took sticks too as it's easy to get out of practise using them and end up with pretty sore shoulders after a race. My next race is in less than 4 weeks and it is a fairly flat route so I think it'll be another one to 'jeff' but with sticks this time. Hopefully all the walking last week will stand me in good stead.
Yesterday it was back to training. A first attempt at 800m reps followed by a strength workout. I didn't get the effort right on the intervals- to begin with I don't think I pushed hard enough and it was only the last 2 that felt about right. But interval training on the road is tricky: it's harder to gauge distance and therefore pace yourself correctly and there are numerous hazards that impact on both speed and effort: it's not flat, there are roads to cross, horse poo and litter to dodge... My running club has a track session once a week but it's at an inconvenient time for me and I don't really want to do someone else's workout. These days I have to listen to what feels right for me.
Strength work is easier although again I could probably push a lot harder than I do. But training at home with minimal equipment (and no dedicated space to train in) means the priority is to stay safe. With my crumbly spine, trying to lift properly heavy is something I shouldn't do unsupervised and unfortunately I don't have a PT to train with. Maybe one day I will be able to rejoin a gym and get to train with someone.
2019 has been a truly awful year. I don't hold out hope of the next one being better because I no longer believe things will improve. I'm worse off than when I was unemployed and newly divorced 10 years ago. A combination of heartbreak and the rapid onset of the loopy hormones has left me fragile and no longer sure of who I am. Hopes and dreams have been well and truly shattered.
But I will keep on moving...
...keep baking...
... and keep blogging.
And maybe I will try running 100 miles again. I have unfinished business with that distance.
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